Chapter the Fifth; In Which Our Hero… Is Awesome
I was pissed. Sorry, kids at home, but ‘upset’, ‘unhappy’, ‘angry’? These were not strong enough words for my feelings toward this current situation and my current villain du jour. It is all I can do to avoid using more colorful adverbs to describe how very pissed I was.
In the past night alone, I have been pounded, thrown, electrocuted, insulted, meddled with, mocked, and had my thumb dislocated. All of these because of some producer for some kind of reality show? And then the guy threatens my girlfriend, my FAMILY? He was going to pay.
Stunner was griping about something as I blew past her on my way to the door out of the cell block. It only took two kicks to twist the door out of its frame and send it crashing onto the floor. The hallway it led to ran straight until it hit a large room filled with monitors and other equipment. Cruel TV’s black little heart, I presume.
The second I came through the door, a blast caught me in the chest. The armor plates hidden in my coat caught the buckshot and my own strength … Continue reading
Chapter the Fourth; In Which Our Hero Learns the Dastardly Plot
Pursuit. If tooling around the city by leaps and bounds is my way of relaxing, chasing down some low life in the same way is my daily recommended exercise. The thing is, it’s not just exercise for my body (which, thanks to the nanites probably doesn’t need it), but for my mind as well; calculating distances and angles over scant seconds, judging the stability of a landing point, or whether my static grips will adhere to a given surface.
Of course, I don’t think of all that in the heat of the moment, I mostly think things like ‘god, I hope he doesn’t cross any wide streets I can’t jump across’ or ‘huh, they really do look like ants from up here’. As I chased Tank’s red jeep, trying to keep an eye on Barn Owl above and Stunner’s ridiculous custom painted black and blue coup, I could only think that there was no way Tank couldn’t tell we were following him.
While he’ll never win a Nobel Prize in the sciences, Tank is no fool; he’d notice the blue tinted headlights from Stunner’s car or catch either Barn … Continue reading
Chapter the Third; In Which Our Hero Engages in Fisticuffs with a Ruffian
Being a superhero generally doesn’t pay unless you’re willing to shill for a private security company or a city. No one pays for your costume and gear repairs, your self defense classes, the sick days you have to take when you’re waiting for your broken ribs to heal, or the pizzas you have to pay Nermal in.
More idealistic people would go on and on at this point about the good vibrations they get from helping people and I’m not going to deny that that’s nice. But sometimes, simpler pleasures abound. Like for example, the very act of being ‘super’ itself.
I have to remind myself sometimes that even with the grip boots and gloves I built, a normal person would shatter their legs running sideways across buildings and making those street spanning leaps. After the first few months of it, I can’t imagine how I’d live without it.
It was all the better that night after leaving Nermal’s place though. After days of waiting and worrying that the city would go straight to a computer chip instigated hell, I had a destination; a recently vacated United … Continue reading
Chapter the Second; In Which Our Hero Seeks Assistance and Explains Superhero Sociology
“Comes at a cost?” Janine asked, pausing in what she was doing. Specifically, she was holding my head in her lap and braiding my hair. No, I don’t know why she was doing it. I’ve learned not to question it on top of putting away any hope of actually being able to cut my long, girlie man hair. Hey, if a beautiful woman likes your girlie man hair, you keep that hair, or else you’re an even bigger girlie man. “You’re exaggerating, aren’t you?”
“Hey, thirty bucks in a great cost with my income.” I defended. “Not to mention leapfrogging all over town trying to keep a pizza warm.”
“You had to deliver pizza for information?” She gave me a confused look and went back to molesting my hair.
“Well, a pizza. The best pizza in the city – probably the world. Mama Cecily’s King Kong special.”
“The one you and Slush are always talking about? The one that’s basically a meat and cheese casserole?”
Slush is my best friend since middle school. Other friends may come and go, but our exploits are legendary. He’s also the … Continue reading
Chapter the First; In Which our Hero Relates a Perplexing Event.
[This story takes place between Descendants Special #2 and Descendants #23]
He stood like an Adonis of prelate-dom on atop his vanquished foe, resplendent in his red, padded shirt and darker breeches, encircled by a gold belt covered with compartments and pouches. His yellow cape billowed dramatically in the wind, showing off the infinity symbol emblazoned upon it in blue. The same symbol, contained within a yellow triangle sat proudly between his rippling pectorals. His dark, shoulder length hair was tied back in a ponytail that also caught the wind just perfectly.
On the ground below him, an unconscious man; who before being soundly dispatched had gone by the name Death Claw (obviously for the outsized, electricity conducting claw he’d grafted to his left arm) lay senseless. He’d been beaten before he’d even been aware that a high speed flying punch was coming his way.
But he wasn’t the focus of attention. Well, honestly, he had been; seeing as how he’d held the mayor hostage and all; but that was before the Champion of the Boroughs, the Defender of the Metropolis, New York’s Prelate: John Harding, AKA; Infinity had … Continue reading